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For the past 7 months I have been planning on getting a divorce. I have made my personal deadline to start the process in March. Anyway, my husband (we are both Active Duty) has decided that he wants to save our marriage. I personally think its too late. Anyway, he told his 1st Sgt. about the situation who then told my 1st Sgt. who then told my section superintendent, who then probably told other higher-ups including my supervisor. Iam not sure exactly what he said about me besides the fact that I am uncooperative. Anyway, now that multiple ppl at work know about my failing marriage I feel pressure to go see a counselor even though it doubt it will help. I was told that if anybody thinks that my personal life is effecting work then the higher-ups will step in. Anyway, the main issue why I want a divorce is him disrespecting me in front of ppl, him attempting to rape me and us constantly fighting verbally and physically and my feeling that it could eventually escalate into something really bad. So, anyway my husband keeps bugging me about seeing a counselor on base who swears that everything is confidential. (The counselors rotate every 45 days) but Iam a little worried about revealing our fights. Wouldnt we both get kicked out of the military. We have never really hurt each other bad but I am sure if I mention it it will be exaggerated. Our physical fights are like him hitting me in the face with the keyboard and me punching him. After 1 hit or two I usually just leave the house. That's one thing I can't stand is ppl hitting me. I hit him as hard or harder than he hits me. Our verbal fights are usually about him not helping around the house at all, him spending too much on credit for electronics, disliking each other's friends, me never fully getting over our physical difference me drk 5'10 slim him wht 5'5 stout which ppl constantly point out esp strangers w. stares, different entertainment interests, him getting drunk and disrespecting me more in front of ppl, me not wanting a joint account, and me not buying stuff for him even though we have the exact same salary and pay all the bills evenly minus me paying for his credit card. I could see a counselor off base but in the state of minnesota I hear there is some kind of law where they have to report everything. I know some of our fights my sound immature but thats also why I want a divorce. We both still need to grow up. Both now recently turned 22 married at 19 only dated a less than a year long-distance b4 marriage. Any advice??
This sounds like a really good story or a horrible nightmare, hmm.. I don't think there is any professional who will keep stuff like this confidential, seriously rape? abuse? Don't feel pressure from everyone to save something that is lost in your heart, also make your husband read what you just wrote and see how confident he feels about loosing everything, not only wife but work. WOW